Hold On
by Red Eyed Cajun
Summary: Age of Apocakypse and Gambit gets a visit from an old friend, an old love and their new born child.


Disclaimer: don't own anything. 

Author Note: I haven't done an age of apocalypse fanfic before, but I just bought the new comic book of the collected works and was absolutely RAGIN' after what happened between Rogue and Gambit. Being a huge Gambit fan myself (can you tell) I was completely gutted. So, this story has sprung out of my anger, its probably a load of rubbish but what the hell, have a read.

It started with just me. I didn't mean to get anyone else involved, it just sort of…happened. The first time I did anything, it was just an accident. There was a group of 'flatscans', humans being terrorised by Apocalypse's minions, and then there was me. The weary wanderer just looking for some piece in my life, unsuccessfully. I had all this rage built up inside of my, just repeating the same thing to myself, over and over again. I needed an outlet, and found it in these minions. It took less than 5 minutes to finish off all of them. All 12 of them. What can I say, I was really mad. The minions were scared, the flatscans were scared, hell I even scared myself, but I felt a lot better.

I found an abandoned shelter on the outskirts of town and sheltered the flatscans in the cellar. Then I realised, I was going to have to find food, water and they were in desperate need of some medical supplies. But this was nothing for a master thief. Due to my kleptomaniac ways some, were eventually able to leave to find a better future. But you know how these things go. That person tells a friend, who tells another friend, who tells-…you get the picture. So eventually I decided I needed some help.

But who do I turn to? Magneto? HA! My former leader, the man that I once considered one of my closest friends, the man who stole the love of my life away from me, right under my nose. No. I couldn't go to him, my pride couldn't have handled it.

However lucky for me, help found me in the shape of Roberto DaCosta. Another mutant who had left the outlawed band of mutants called the X-men. Always wanting to help, Roberto immediately got into the swing of things. But more help was yet to come. While out on 'lookout' I came across a young girl who's mutant powers were just appearing. A young girl with a lot of angry idea's in her head. A young girl who was easily persuaded into joining my merry band of thieves, a persuasion I know she know regrets. But jubilee is a smart girl and she knows she has no where else to go. And then I met Lila. Lila Cheney-Singer and also intergalactic thief. She fitted in right away. And her roadie, Guido- a big guy with a huge crush on his boss. Cant say I blame him. Lila is one stunner with her long raven hair and shinning eyes and her very, very enticing outfits. Lila herself is a flatscan, that's how I met her. She was running away from Apocalypses goons, Guido trying to fight them off as they ran, but there was too many. That's when I came in, all knight and shining armour and created hell on earth. Lila was very, very grateful for rescuing her and immediately joined up to my cause. Naturally so did Guido.

And so my band of 'merry men' were created. Robbing from Apocalypse and giving to the flatscans, with a small percentage for us, well, when all else said, we were thieves. And although we did good work, my mind kept wandering back to the outlawed group of mutants led by my once best friend. To her. Rogue. Sometimes I would wake up in the morning (or what I assumed to be morning. It was hard to tell, time had been destroyed when Apocalypse took over.) ready to go back to them, but then I could never leave. Lila would say I couldn't leave because I had created so much here. Nice girl, always ready to boost my ego. But I knew the truth, I was too afraid to what I might find. Oh I had heard there was a child. Charles. But she couldn't touch him.

And so I find myself in my present state. A letter in one hand, brought to me by my old friend Bobby Drake and a large bottle of recently acquired alcohol in my other hand, half empty. Well, well, well. I would not return to the nest so the mother bird has come in search of me. I finished off the bottle of alcohol.

The door to my room opened and little jubilee bounced into the room, a plate of food in her hand.  
"Hey boss. Grubs up. We got steak. Well could be anything really. Steak from dog. Steak from rat. But is meat all the same. We got potatoes, with mouldy green bits on it, but Roberto cooked it with some herbs, which could just be grass but if you squint like this it looks ok." I looked up at her and her smile began to disappear. "Geez boss, I don't mean to be mean or anything, but you look like shit. Who's the letter from?" She said grabbing it from my hand before I could stop her, "ah, I see. Its from that Rogue person. Well that explains the stench of Gin in the room. Oh come on Boss. Move ON! So your best friend stole her away from you! MOVE ON! There are plenty more fish in the sea. Well…there's really no fish in the sea since apocalypse poisoned all of them, but that's not the point!"

I couldn't take this anymore. It was just the high pitch of her voice. It was because I knew what she was saying was true. I needed to move on.

"Jubilee. I don' feel like talkin' much jus' now-."

"No, you feel like drowning your sorrows in a bottle. Well this is where it ends." She snatched the bottle out of my hand, "That's right sir, from now on you are on the wagon! Got it!"

"Jubilee. Roberto needs you upstairs."

I didn't even hear the door open over Jubilee's rant, but there was Lila standing in the frame, the light shinning in behind her. Smiling.

"Fine. But could you please tell this sucker to stop moaning over her soppy ex-girlfriend and move on."

"I'll try." said Lila as Jubilee stormed out of the room.

I sighed in relief as Lila sat down on the ground beside me. She didn't say anything. That was annoying. Jubilee would just talk, and talk and after a while I could just tune out and ignore her. But I couldn't ignore silence.

"Rogue's comin' t'visit."

Silence.

"She's brining Magneto."

Silence.

"And Charles."

Silence.

Damn her. She knew that if she just stayed silent I would end up telling her everything.

"I t'ink dey're tryin' t'torture me."

"They are not trying to torture you. They want you back. You are a good fighter Remy, they want you on their side." Her voice was silky and calming, she always seemed to sound like she was singing even when she was just talking. It was nice to listen too.

"Well I don' wan' dem t'come."

"So reply to them. Tell them not to."

"I cant."

"Why?"

Why? Why did I want to put myself through the torture of having them there? Because I wanted to see her.

"Cause, when all's said and done, he's de boss. Magneto. I report t'him. Dats de way it goes."

"You are your own person Remy. You don't need to take orders from him."

"Jus' like yo' don' have t'take orders from me?"

"That's different."

"How?"

"Because I choose to take orders from you."

'Ah Lila,' I think, 'Yo' always manage t'boost dat ego o' mine. Little do yo' know de scoundrel dat I really am. I pretend I don' know Lila, but I do. I've seen de way yo' look at me. But I cant return it. Not when my thoughts consist only of her. Rogue.'

I feel her eyes on me, searching for something, for what I don't know, just searching. Suddenly there is a commotion from upstairs. And a loud commanding voice floats down to my room.

"Looks like your visitors are here already Remy." She says standing up, "Will you come and meet them?"

"Yes."

I stagger up the stairs wishing now that I hadn't had that whole bottle of gin. But Lila is there to help me as I stumble.

And there they are.

The Happy Family.

And here is me.

The Pathetic Drunk.

Magneto has changed. He is older, his face more lined, or is it scared? He has lost the powerful form he once had. He is hunched over, his white hair flowing down past his shoulders. He is old.

Rogue has not changed. She is still as young as she was when I left. Her skin still looks smooth and pale like the stone statues of Aphrodite in Grecian temples. She stands tall and proud, and her short bobbed hair surrounds her face, her white streak covering her forehead. Her green eyes shinning. Shinning with tears?

And in her arms. The child Charles.

"Gambit, it is good to see you again." Magneto steps towards me, his arms outstretched. I step back, glaring. He is at a loss of what to do, he looks around at the people watching-Roberto, Guido, Jubilee, Lila and the flatscans, "May we speak in private?"

None of them moved. Roberto and Guido stand as if ready to attack the master of magnetism, jubilee simply glares, but the flatscans look at him with fear, but do not move. My loyal friends. I nod to them, and they begin to leave. But not before Roberto has once last word,

"Any trouble Gambit and we'll be just outside."

"Merci." Lila goes to leave with him but I hold her arm, "non, yo' stay." Why did I do that? Maybe because I knew if she left, I would not have her to help me stand up, the drink was affecting my balance. Or maybe I did it for comfort. She smiles and me and returns to my side. Magneto raises and eyebrow, "Yo' surprised mags, do yo really t'ink I wanna be left alone in a room wit ma worst enemy."

"I am not your Enemy."

"Close enough."

Silence.

"So what brings yo' t'dis neck o'de woods? Wantin' c'mon my team?"

"It was not my decision to come here."

He steps aside to let Rogue take centre stage. He takes Charles from her arms and retreats back into the shadows.

She looks at me with those green eyes. Searching. But not like Lila. I feel like she is looking write through me, seeing my weakness. Her.

"When ya left Remy, ya didn't exactly leave on good terms."

"Whose faults dat den?"

It was a stupid comment but I was feeling stupid.

"Ah'm sorry if ah hurt ya Remy but this is ma life now. Ah'm with Erik, we have a son."

"I can see dat. I'm happy for yo'. Yo' got what yo' always wanted. A husban' a chil'. Someone who can touch yo' wit'out fear o'yo'r powers absorbin' dem. Yo' got what yo' wanted. So leave me alone."

I had struck a nerve. I could begin to see tears welling up in those perfect green eyes. And for a moment I wanted to take back my words, but they had been said, and they needed to have been said.

She turned to face Magneto and said, "Could ya leave us?" he nodded and left. And then she turned to Lila.

"I'll leave Remy."

"yo' don have t'Lila."

"I know."

But she left anyway. And so now we were alone. And I was feeling the tension.

"Please Rogue, jus' go back t'yo'r perfect world."

"That's it Remy. It's not perfect. Ah cant touch ma son! Ah cant hold him! Ah'm his mama and ah cant hold him! The only way ah'm eva gonna get the chance ta do that is if ah stay with Erik."

"Yo' made dat choice long ago cher-…Rogue. Yo' chose him before yo' had dat chil'. Yo' chose t'love him-"

"There is no love!"

What was that supposed to mean? There is no love? She chose him. The End. She chose not to love me, but him. What does that mean?

She walks towards me and suddenly I'm holding her in my arms, suddenly she is looking up at me with those green eyes, expectantly. Like I can solve all her problems.

"There is no love. When ah chose magneto, when ya think ah chose magneto, ah was going by instincts. He was hurt, he was the leader, ah needed ta save him."

"But afterwards-"

"I married him because the group needed stability, it needed not just one leader, but two. They needed something' ta hold on ta."

"And Charles-"

"Ah needed something ta. Ah'm only human Remy! But I don' love Magneto and he don't love me either." "So why are yo' here telling' me dis? Why are yo' puttin' me t'rough dis?"

"Cause ah need ya ta understand dis. And…lahke ah said, everyone needs something ta believe in. Ah love ya."

She said it. The three words I wanted her to say, and she tells me it now. Her, with her husband, her child, tells me, the thief, the drunk, a man so corrupted by his own feelings, that's she loves me.

"Chere…I never stopped lovin' yo'. Never."

The tears that had been in her eye crashed onto her cheeks as I held her tighter. We both knew that this moment would never come again. It was not only the fact that she had a husband and child, but the world was near destruction, and she was right. She was a leader. She needed to lead her team. With confidence. She couldn't lead them like this, this little girl that I'm holding in my arms. Things should not have been like this. She is still so young, but she has so much responsibility. Now I see why she had come, because we needed this moment to be ourselves. Both of us leaders. Both of us with our commitments. But we have this one chance to be the young people that we are.

And that was enough.

There were no words. Just a smile and she turned and left the room. With every step she took I knew that we could never be together, not now, not in this world.

But as I watched them leave and as I felt Lila move closer to me and wrap her arms around me, I knew that in some world, somewhere far away, it did work. Remy and Rogue were together, forever.

They lived happily ever after.

Even with this realisation, there was still hope that one day, it would work out, that the love that Rogue and I shared, would be allowed to blossom. And that was something to hold on to. To fight for.

And then, I could move on.


End file.
